the last two parties i invited him to, he's shown up at. i forced myself to stay talking to someone until he came over to me. i will play this cool.
it was good. i'd had some vanilla vodka and coke, and a shot of wild turkey, and the party was much more enjoyable because of it. i was social instead of hiding in a corner of the kitchen somewhere. and i ended up talking to him and enjoying myself and not feeling strange and awkward. this is good.
i fixed my friend's headache at some point, and then suddenly another was asking me to fix his back. then another. and during this, the boy was saying that his back hurt a lot from going to the show the night before. hints? i didn't offer yet. i will play this cool.
round 3:00 there was what i'm sure was a stunning duet rendition of rilo kiley's "portions for foxes" as performed by angela and beatpoetgrrl. into which he came, and asked if i'd like to join him in the basement for a smoke. which ended up with the two of us sitting at a table, him telling me how he used to go into the city to go to work with his father, and how he gets his niceness from his mother, and how much he loves his new job. and with me sitting and listening and trying to keep my eyes from crossing. and very nearly showing him my online diary. which he hopefully didnt see the url for.
we went upstairs, which is when the apartment started spinning. when it stopped, i was sitting on the couch. that's when i plucked up the nerve to say "hey do you want me to rub your back?" and he did. so that was good. then we sat around and he played name-that-tune with ring tones. i got sanford and son but not mcguyver. then he went home and i fell asleep on the couch.
so nothing really juicy happened. but i'm thinking of this as a positive step along a series of increments that could lead to me actually getting some, one day.
hello, my name is beatpoetgrrl, and i'm a dork.
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