welcome to the first ever randomly-spaced "Ask beatpoetgrrl A Question Week!" not exactly a flood of questions here, people. apparently most of you know more than you wanted to know about me in the first place.
ask away:
Okay I have two questions. 1)What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning? 2)What is your favorite memory? hardest-itch
1. the first thing i think of when i wake up in the morning depends on the day. on weekends i tend to meander along the waking-up process. on weekdays it's more of a "mmphfff. i'm up. do i have to go to work? what time is it? five more minutes?" 2. i don't think i even know where to start on a favorite memory...i had a very lucky and happy childhood; i grew up in a really rural area, playing outside and making up my own stories and climbing rocks. they all mix together into giant blends of happy thoughts. the first time i wrote a poem that gave me goosebumps, my first kiss, and all the times i've felt in control and grown-up and whole.
what is the most beautiful thing you have ever seen? resistivity
hmmm. i think i will answer these in a slightly different order. 2. $50,000 doesn't go very far in the donation field. and i have no idea how i'd break it up, so i'll just list my favorite nonprofits: amnesty international, doctors without borders, planned parenthood, rainn, and the lower shore family YMCA, where i used to work. the salvation army does good work too, but they have questionable moral beliefs so i don't list them (though i do enjoy their thrift stores). 3. i think i feel the most loved when i go back to visit my college town, or when i visit my best friend. something about knowing and liking most of the people i run into when i go out. that doesn't happen much here anymore. 1. i spent years reading and writing well-behaved poems about nature and my childhood; suddenly one day in college i took a class called "literature of the 1950s." i was expecting vonnegut and salinger, what i got was howl. i don't think i have ever been the same. i discovered that poetry could be a revolutionary act in itself. that it could have energy and force and really say something. i wrote dear allen and it was like a breaking point for me. i don't think i could go back if i tried.
When you were sixteen, what did you think you'd be like when you were twenty-five? Were your predictions in any way accurate? jerseydevil
oh man, i don't think i even want to answer this one...when i was sixteen, i was incredibly naive. i went to church faithfully, i sang in the choir, and i believed that god had a Plan for me, and all i had to do was follow it. true, i had my first boyfriend, and i wasn't so naive as to believe that i would be with him forever. and i wanted to write, always. i thought i was going to be an actress for a while. but i think deep down i knew who i was going to become.
a few years later i had a Plan for myself. i was going to major in english, i was going to go to graduate school, and i was going to write.
so i'm twenty-five now, and i haven't graduated from undergrad yet, but i still want to go to grad school, major in poetry. i'm thinking about poetry therapy. so yeah, i'm not sure i remember correctly how i felt at 16. but i know i'm on a detour loop, heading for the right direction.
beatpoetgrrl
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